Dark and Light As One
by Kiku18
Summary: A series of LxLight oneshots originally born from a writing prompts website.
1. You Looked Better on Myspace

Title: You Looked Better on Myspace

Prompt: Some photos were quite compelling

Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note. I know, shocker.

I was looking for a companion.

That's why when I was making my myspace profile I put a check next to the "I am looking for a serious relationship" box.

I quickly scanned my newly made profile. It was nothing fancy, just a little information about what I studied in school and some of my favorite things to do.

Suddenly I heard the noise of a swivel chair moving in my direction. I quickly barred down the page and opened the case file. I was at work after all.

"What is Light-kun doing?" the mysterious man I had been working with for the past year asked.

"I'm working on the case, L. I want to catch Kira as much as you do."

"Do you?" he murmured, half to himself.

I resented him. He knew I was Kira. He would always be watching every move I made. I would always have to be careful.

L went back to his work station, so I got back on myspace. I scrolled down to my "friends" section, expecting to see it empty. To my surprise there was already someone there.

_Tom? Who is this Tom person?_ I thought to myself. Then a message popped up in my inbox. I wondered who would have already sent me a message.

I looked at the sender, and my body stiffened. _Why on earth would HE have a myspace account?_

The message read:

"Light-kun, this is not the Kira case file. –L"

Next to the message was a picture of the man sitting next to me.

I forced myself not to look at him. It would only make the situation more strange to see him staring at me out of the corner of his eye like he always does.

I typed a response, my fingers on the keys sounding like gun shots in the quiet room.

"Give me a break, L. You're not working either. –Light"

Send.

Wait.

Ding.

New message.

"If you insist on wasting your time during work hours, I would appreciate it if you at least answered me one question. Who is Tom? –L"

I turned to face L.

"I have absolutely no idea."

~Author's Note~

This is totally not the direction I was going to have this story go in, but hey, it was late so I let my muses take over. I hope it resulted in a short but amusing story.


	2. Take You to the Candy Shop

**Title: Take You To the Candy Shop**

**Prompt:** **"We're out of cake!"**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note. If I did however, Matt would get more screen time. =D**

**~A/N: Wow this is a long one. I guess I just felt empowered by the reviews I got. Thanks you guys! I find it sad though how I'm so unused to getting reviews that I spaz out over two. Anyhoo I stayed up till 12:10 writing this, so I hope you like it.**

Tap.

Tap.

Tap.

Tap.

My jaw clenched. My eyes screwed up. I pinched the bridge of my nose.

It had been a long day. To be more precise it had been a long 32 hours. The team had pulled an all-nighter because of a new lead on the Kira Case. To put it politely we were all very irritable.

Tap.

Tap.

Tap.

Tap.

My hands balled into fists. The whole situation was not being made any more pleasant with L's incessant tapping. I had a serious migraine, probably stress induced, and the noise, amplified by the cavernous room, was eventually going to split my head in half.

Tap.

Tap.

Tap.

Tap.

How I longed to reach over and snap the pen in half. I saw my coworkers looking at the pen with similar feelings mirrored on their faces. However, they would never confront anyone about something like that. They were too spineless.

Tap.

Tap.

Tap.

Tap.

My head was throbbing. I had three choices. 1: Get L to stop. 2: Leave the room. And 3: Shoot myself.

I wasn't able to leave the room because I was working and shooting myself just seemed pointless so I decided to go through with number 1 before I went crazy.

Tap.

Tap.

Tap-

"L, could you please stop doing that?"

"Mmm? What is Light-kun referring to?"

"Could you please stop tapping your pen on the desk?"

"Does it bother Light-kun?" He cocked his head and looked at me in that infuriating way.

"Yes quite frankly it does. Can't you go eat some cake or something?"

"While I do not appreciate the sarcasm in that statement, I in fact cannot because there is no cake left."

"There's no cake? That's awful strange," Matsuda said, entering the conversation. "What about ice cream or any other sweets you like?"

"There is nothing in this building that contains copious amounts of sugar as of now. I consumed all such things last night."

"Can't Watari go to the store and buy some?" Matsuda asked.

I frankly didn't care at that point. The tapping had stopped and my head was safe from splitting open. Whether or not L had sugar in his bloodstream was of no concern to me.

"Watari had business to attend to elsewhere, so he left."

"Why don't you just drive down to the supermarket and get some?"

L looked Matsuda straight in the eye and said "I can't drive."

I held back a laugh. He can solve homicide cases in minutes but he can't drive a car? Oh, the irony.

"Really? Well I'll drive you, Ryuzaki!" Matsuda exclaimed looking like an excited puppy.

"No, that will not be necessary. Light-kun can drive me. That is, if he's not busy," He turned to look at me. There was something different about his eyes. They lacked the usual luster that only his grey eyes could have. He really did need sugar.

I exited my game of solitaire, stood up, and grabbed my car keys. "All right, L. Let's go."

* * *

_Why had I agreed to do this? _I wondered. L had started his tapping again. This time his object of choice was the case of the CD he had brought. When I had asked him why he brought the CD he had said he couldn't stand public radio. The CD was loaded up with a mix of classical music and J pop.

While granted that the tapping was quieter and somewhat muffled by the music it still bothered me. He wasn't normally this twitchy.

"So, is the tapping obsession a side effect from the lack of sugar?"

"I assume so because I find myself tapping and I don't know why I would be compelled to do so," He replies very logically.

A loud song then came on and prevented any further discussion. If I had felt like it I could have turned the volume down but L looked content to sit in that odd way he does bobbing his head to the music. I wondered what an officer would say if we got pulled over.

When we pulled up the confectionery L's eyes practically grew twice in size and his breathing became fast and shallow. His addiction was clearly not a healthy one.

_Why indulge it? _I thought. _It wouldn't be good if he got sick from all the sweets._

Then L turned to me and smiled.

"Let's go in Light-kun!"

And I had to go.

As we walked up to the store I braced myself for L's rampage. I was sure based on all the withdrawal symptoms he had been showing when he entered the store he would go crazy. Exactly like a kid in a candy store. That's what we were in anyway. Just a fancy named candy store for adults.

L opened the door and a little bell jingled, signaling our entrance. I almost flinched.

However his reaction was much different from my expectations. He walked around the displays with the look of a jeweler carefully inspecting his gems.

He looked at the artfully designed cakes with a practiced eye.

He payed attention to the slightest details when inspecting the truffles.

He studiously peered at the various kinds of fudge as if they would somehow change if he looked away.

The gleam in his eyes was back.

I slapped my credit card down on the register and mumbled to the cashier, "Ring up whatever he wants."

* * *

It was a good haul. We came home with two more cakes, four more pounds of fudge, and over twenty more chocolate creations than we had left with. And that didn't count all the things that L ate in the car.

"Oh, those look good! Can I have some, Ryuzaki?" Matsuda exclaimed looking at all the sweets L had arranged on a silver tray.

"Of course not, Matsu-kun," L said looking up at the detective with a smile.

**Review and there will be cookies.**


	3. Wrath of Misa

**Title: Wrath of Misa**

**Disclaimer: Disclaimed**

**~A/N: While this one could be a two shot, I've decided against doing that. Right now I'm trying to warm Light up to the idea of being gay, you're going to have to wait till next chapter for any serious LightxL action. And I'm putting the prompt at the bottom so it won't give you any hints about what's going to happen. Enjoy (hopefully)!**

_Oh Shit._

I looked up at L. "We need to leave, NOW."

_~ FLASHBACK! ~_

I slowly trudged my way into the Kira Task Force Headquarters. Another day of work and another night of Misa. With expectations that low it was a wonder I had crawled out of bed.

I sat down at my station, scanned the room to make sure no one was there, and proceeded to bang my head against the edge of the desk.

It was her goddamn voice. That was the worst. It was so high-pitched only dogs could hear it. And the complete nonsense that came out of her mouth! _'Maybe if I bang my head against this desk long enough,' _I thought to myself. _'I'll lose all my brain cells so the things she says actually sound intelligent.'_

"Light-kun, are you feeling all right?" I heard a voice ask.

I slumped against the desk. _'I thought no one was here yet!'_

"No L, I'm not."

"May I ask what is troubling you?" L got up and sat next to me,

"It's nothing you can help with," I said trying to avoid answering the question.

"Still, sometimes it helps to talk about such things."

"Alright fine," I gave in, sitting up. "I really don't want to go out tonight, but I have plans with someone."

"Do you not want to go out, or do you not want to be with the person?"

"I'd say the latter."

"Then cancel your plans. It isn't a difficult decision Light-kun. I do not know why you are spending so much time thinking about this."

"I can't _cancel_ on her, she'd kill me!"

"Ah, so the person is female. Am I correct in assuming that this person you do not want to spend time with is Misa?"

"Yeah, that's right."

"If you don't like to spend time with her, why are you dating her?" L asked.

"That's a good question."

"Light, I think I have a solution for your problem."

"Oh, and what would that be?"

"Don't go. Go somewhere with me," he said staring me in the eye.

Whether it was sleep deprivation, or that my subconscious really wanted a break from Misa too, I'll never know. But whatever the reason, the offer was looking really good at that time.

"Sure L, why not. Take me wherever you want," I said as I slumped back down onto the desk for a quick nap.

~ Present Time ~

So that's how it happened. I didn't meet up with Misa for our date, and I didn't tell her I wasn't coming. l had Watari drive us to a fancy French restaurant with a name I couldn't pronounce. We were having a good time. Unlike Misa, L had a brain and actually made stimulating conversation. I didn't regret a thing. At least not till I got a certain call.

"Light, what happened?" L asked, concerned.

"Misa just called," I saw a look of horror flit across his normally composed face. "And she is _pissed_."

"What? Is she coming here?"

"Yes, she's heading this way. We have to leave."

"How did she find out where we were?" L asked while flagging out waiter.

"How should I know? She's Misa, maybe she got Santa Claus to tell her!" I replied sarcasticly while handing the waiter two hundreds.

"But sir-" the waiter attempted to say.

"Keep the change," I said firmly.

And then she found us.

"LIGHT YAGAMI, YOU ARE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE!" I heard her scream from across the restaurant.

_'Oh god,'_ I thought. _They'll never let us in here again.'_

She continued to scream as she made her over to our table.

"I have NEVER one in my LIFE been stood up. Not when I dated actors, not even when I dated professional football players."

The poor bystanders looked scared out of their wits. They were about to experience Hurricane Misa.

"So when I found out you were not only ditching me, but that you were ditching me for Ryuzaki, I think you know that I got a little ANGRY!" She screamed that last part in my face.

I tried to use the typical cheater line. "Look Misa, it's not what you think-"

And of course it didn't work.

"Yes it IS! You stood me UP! I mean, I've been such a good girlfriend," she started to ramble. "I mean the worst thing I did was install that tracker in you phone, and anyway that came in hand a lot of times, especially today. I gave you anniversary presents all the time, even though you didn't remember, and remember those cute socks?" She looked at me expectantly.

"Misa," I sighed. "You're embarrassing yourself."

"Embarrassing myself? I'm sorry, but I think you already covered the "embarrassing Misa" department pretty well, so I don't think that's possible anymore. I just wanted to say that I am SO not your girlfriend anymore."

Once he had recovered from shock, L called Watari and had him drive us back to the Kira Task Force Headquarters.

I sunk down into one of the many black leather chairs that occupied the main room.

"Well that was interesting," L said as he sat down in a chair too.

"As traumatizing as that was, I'm glad it's over with. Now I never have to hear to her voice ever again."

"You have to be impressed with the fact that she was actually forming coherent, grammatically correct sentences while she was yelling at you."

I just groaned and pressed my fists into my eyes.

We stayed silent for a few minutes. I was thinking about the benefits of my now Misa free life and L... L was probably calculating the odds on whether or not I was Kira, or something.

I was perfectly happy just sitting there thinking, but apparently the universe doesn't like me being happy.

"You know you have to talk to her, don't you?" L asked, peering at me.

"What are you talking about, L?"

"You have to go apologize and get back together with her."

"That's crazy! Why would I have to do that?" I stared incredulously at him.

"She's vital to the case. We have to keep her around."

"No," I said firmly.

"Light, you have to," he said equally firm. "She's the only possible connection we have to Kira. We have to keep her close where we can monitor her."

Damn. He was right. (Note: This is during the period where Light doesn't know he's Kira.)

"So what am I supposed to do, huh? Show up at her door with flowers, and hope she doesn't murder me on spot?"

"Well based on the advice various pop culture references give us, shouldn't you sing to her from below her window?"

"L, she lives in an apartment."

"Then I suppose outside in the hall will suffice."

"This is crazy," I said holding my head in my hands. "I can't believe I'm actually going to do this."

"So," L said leaning forward. "What song are you going to sing?"

"I'll say it again, this is crazy."

There we were. Outside Misa's apartment. Ready to make me look like a fool.

"Considering the fact that Misa is also mad at me, and it would not do well for her to see me, I will be waiting out of sight."

"Good idea," I managed to say.

I was starting to get nervous. _'Why the hell did I agree to this?"_

L disappeared and I knew it was time to start.

_'Okay, you can do this, Light. It'll be over soon, so just grit your teeth and do it."_

"It's hard to believe that I couldn't see you were always right beside me."

I was signing pretty loud. I wondered if I was going to wake the neighbors. When was Misa going to come out? _God, L must be laughing his head off right now._

"Thought I was alone with no one to hold, but you were always right beside me."

A head popped out from a neighboring door. I gave the man a helpless look. Me, of all people, helpless.

"This feeling's like no other. I want you to know that I've never had someone that knows me like you do."

More heads were appearing, some confused and some angry, but still no Misa.

"I've never had someone as good for me as you, no one like you!"

The door in front of me clicked open.

"So lonely before I finally found what I've been looking for," I sang to a sputtering, lingerie clad Misa.

Well I wasn't dead yet. That was a good sign.

"Light, what are you doing here? Were you singing High School Musical? Have you even seen High School Musical?" she stared at me with her mouth hanging open.

"Well, girls like musicals, right?" _'Damn you, L!' _"And as for that last question, uh, no."

A few people behind me chuckled. That caused Misa to snap back into focus, and she noticed the congregation that encircled us.

"Excuse me, ever heard of privacy?" she said icily.

The spectators, realizing the show was over, went back to their respective apartments.

"Light, what are you doing here?" she asked again.

"Misa, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you, and I just want to get back together," I gave her one of my patent pending, heart-melting puppy dog faces.

"Oh Light, I'm sorry too! I shouldn't have yelled at you. Never do that ever again!" she exclaimed pulling me into a choke hold and pressing my head into the twins. Then she dragged me into her apartment.

The last thing I saw was L emerging from the staircase where he had been hiding, looking horrified. I stretched out my hand toward him.

**Prompt: "Did you just serenade me with High School Musical?"**

**Review and Light will jump L. Just click the button.**


	4. StarBucks

**Title: StarBucks**

**Prompt: And all I wanted was a cup of coffee.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note. If I did I would have given Misa a less annoying voice.**

**~A/N: Okay. Light is really mad at me right now. In my mind he doesn't want to be gay, but also in my mind I say "Too friggin bad." So yah. I promised LxLight action for reviews, so now I have to deliver. I have absolutely no experience writing yaoi. It took a lot of effort to write this. Anywhoo, sorry Light. Well, not really.**

Light walked to the Kira Task Force kitchen with a mission. He could smell its earthy, bitter aroma. Just thinking about it made him itch.

He needed coffee. He couldn't function without coffee. Plain and simple, it was an addiction.

Lately L had been acting like a slave driver. Their already long hours had been increased, and it was really getting to him. So, to keep up with L's growing expectations he had upped his coffee intake to about a full pot a day. He wasn't proud of it, but he needed caffeine to get through the day. And he needed it _now_.

He rounded the corner into the kitchen and saw something that made his head pound with irritation.

Matsuda was, without a care in the world, pouring the last cup of coffee from a freshly made pot.

"Oh, good morning Light!" the cheerful bastard said.

"Morning," Light grunted as he rummaged through the cupboards for more coffee grinds. This was taking too long. And it didn't help that Matsuda was just standing there _sipping away_.

"Wait, did you want some coffee? Wow, I'm sorry Light, I didn't know. Do you want mine?" Matsuda held the cup out to Light.

Light forced a smile, and replied as natural as possible, "No that's fine. I'll just make a new pot."

"Well the thing is, we're all out of coffee grinds."

Light froze mid-search. No coffee? Well do we have any soda?" Light asked while dashing to the fridge.

"I don't think so," he heard Matsuda say.

He was right. No soda. Not that there would have been any room for it with all of L's deserts.

"I'll be right back," Light said leaving the room.

He headed toward the Task Force Parking Lot. He would go to the store, buy a Mountain Dew and some coffee grinds, drink the Mountain Dew on the way back, and then make another pot of coffee when he got back.

However, his plans were set back when he saw L getting out of his car, which was parked right next to his. There was no avoiding it.

"Hello, L," he said approaching his car.

"Hello, Light. Where are you off to in such a hurry?"

Light sighed. "We're all out of coffee grinds, so I was going to go to the store and buy some."

"I have a better idea," L said as he leaned across Light's driver-side door so he couldn't open it. "How about Watari buys some, and you and I go to Starbucks?"

It was a tempting offer, coffee sooner rather than later. But if he had to go with L, that would cause problems. Light was currently trying to avoid being near him.

"Fine," Light said, addiction winning out over the rest of his brain. "I'll meet you there."

"No, that won't do. You'll come in my car. We don't want to waste gas, now do we?" L said grabbing Light and pushing him in the car's open door.

"Does this count as kidnap?" Light asked as L got in the car beside him.

"No, not really because you're free to leave at any moment," L replied.

"I just want to know my legal options."

Light did not like the position he was in at the moment. He had been trying to avoid L (as best as possible considering the fact they worked together) and here he was sitting so close to him their legs were almost touching. In addition the lack of caffeine was making him jumpy. This was not a good combination.

The car stopped outside the Starbucks, and Watari told L to call him when they were done.

Light and L walked into the store. There were many small tables where you could sit.

"You choose a table while I get us some coffee," L said to Light. Light had figured they would just get some coffee then leave, but he knew it was no use to argue.

He sat down at a small table in the corner of the store. L came over with their drinks and sat down across from him.

Light looked at the drink L had placed in front of him. It smelled like coffee, but he couldn't see what it looked like, so he was suspicious. Also, the fact that L's drink-which was in a clear container, unlike his-was a greenish color didn't help.

"Just drink it, Light. It's coffee," L said.

"Did you get me the same thing?" Light asked pointing to L's frothy drink.

"No, this is a mint chocolate chip frappuccino. That is plain coffee," L explained.

Light took an experimental sip to make sure. Yup, it was coffee, and it was better than the usual stuff he drank.

"So, why did you get that if we came to get coffee?" Light asked trying to make conversation.

"Because despite its appearance, it has the same caffeine amount as coffee, and it tastes like candy." L said smiling.

Light's heart fluttered at the sight of L's smile. He wasn't comfortable with this. He had been trying to ignore these feelings. He wasn't supposed to feel this way.

And fate was apparently laughing at him. To make matters worse a young couple sat down at a table neat Light and L's.

"They look like they're in love," L said as he watched the couple kiss between mouthfuls of coffee. "Have you ever been in love, Light?"

Light sighed. "No I've never been in love with a woman before."

"Not even Misa?"

"No, definitely not Misa."

"That's quite sad. To have been in multiple serious relationships but to never have been in love."

"I suppose," Light said quietly.

He looked over at L. He didn't want to admit it. This was not the way things were supposed to work out. He was supposed to find a woman he loved and thought was beautiful, and have a family.

He didn't want to admit that the feelings he had for L were not in fact respect, of even friendship. It just wasn't natural.

L stared back at Light with the same intensity.

"Well, if you've never been in love with a woman, maybe you should try your hand at men."

**~A/N: Bridget, if you're reading this, please don't tell Mom I'm writing yaoi fanfics.**

**Please Review!**


	5. Betty Crocker

**Title: Betty Crocker**

**(No prompt this time)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own death note, the beatles, the song savoy truffle, betty crocker, or the betty crocker bake and fill. Well, I own one, but I don't have the trade mark thingy. I think that's the longest disclaimer I've ever had to do.**

**~A/N: Sorry I've been gone so long! I think it's been like a month or something. I've been really busy because my grandma is moving into our house (oh joy), so we have to sell her house and all that crap. I've also been on an anime/fanfiction ban. My dad thinks I have a "fixation". I'm going to be updating really quickly from now on because I kinda want to wrap this thing up so I can write a shugo chara fic. Oh and this time I'm writing from both L and Light's pov. I'm a bit scared because I keep thinking L is going to pop out of my closet and yell at me about how he doesn't think like that, and if that happened I might have a heart attack and die.**

**~L's POV~**

"Light-"

"No, L"

"Why?"

"Because."

"That's not a complete sentence so I won't accept it as an answer."

"You know why."

I sighed. Such unexpected complications.

Sofas: Otherwise known as couches, futons, or love seats. By definition they can seat two people. If one did not, it wouldn't be a sofa.

So why was it that Light was sitting on one by himself and I was sitting alone in a chair across from him? There was a perfectly acceptable spot for me sit right next to him. Instead I had to look at him from across a coffee table.

I wanted to sit next to him. I wanted to play with his hair. I wanted to smell the cologne he always wore. But none of the above were options because of a small problem.

Light wasn't how you say "out of the closet".

Then again, neither was I considering my sexual orientation had never come up in conversation.

"So the whole point of this," I said gesturing to the current seating arrangement. "is that you don't want to be found out?"

"Yes!" Light said looking around to make sure no one had overheard despite the fact that we were in an empty room.

"And you're not going to ever come near me while we're at work?"

Another affirmative from Light.

"Well that certainly does make things awkward," I mutter under my breath.

Then Matsuda walked into the room and sat down next to Light, putting an end to our conversation.

"Good morning guys! I swear I don't know how you two do it." Light paled as he said that. "You stay here the latest and still come in earlier than the rest of us," He said in his usual chipper fashion.

Light put on a fake smile-I can always tell when he's faking-and answered in a calm voice, "We just don't sleep, I guess"

Matsuda laughed at Light's "joke" not knowing it was true. Little did anyone know neither of us actually left the Task Force Headquarters, and just as Light said, we didn't exactly sleep.

"Well, let's get to work," I said standing up. "There's a new lead I want to investigate."

* * *

**~Light's POV~**

I pretended to look at the computer screen as my eyes glazed over.

_Boring._

"Hey, look at this!" I heard Matsuda exclaim. "I think I found something!"

_Stupid._

"Matsu-kun, we already knew Kira has been killing people other than criminals," L corrected.

_Gorgeous._

L met my stare and gave me a small pout. I returned the favor with a exasperated eye roll.

He was upset and I felt bad about it but, it's wasn't my fault my father would go crazy if he found out I was gay. I was really doing him a favor by not making things any more complicated.

I angled the computer monitor so the rest of the force couldn't see and signed on aim. To get L's attention I tapped on the desk and once he looked over I mouthed "aim".

He angled the monitor as I had and signed on.  
**Savoy_Truffle3:** Yes? (A/N: Haha, savoy truffle is the name of a beatles song)

**Yagami57: **You know this isn't my fault, right?

**Savoy_Truffle3: **That's arguable.

I glanced over at L, expecting him to be looking back as usual, but his eyes were fixed on the computer screen.

**Yagami57: **All right I suppose it is. How about I make it up to you by letting you choose something we can do during the lunch break as long as it doesn't make us look like a couple. Anything you want.

**Savoy_Truffle3: **Let's bake a cake.

* * *

**~L's POV~**

"I had Watari buy everything we would need," I said as Light looked at the collection of culinary supplies that filled almost all the counter tops in the kitchen.

"We need all this stuff? I thought we were just baking a cake." Light said as he picked up one of the various boxes. "This thing looks like a medieval torture device."

"It's called a Betty Crocker Bake and Fill," I said snatching the box away from him. "And it's what we are going to be baking the cake in."

"You have got to be kidding me."

"I most certainly am not. Now beat these eggs while I start making the frosting."

* * *

**~Light's POV~**

"Here," L said as he handed me a slice of cake.

"Wait a minute, I only agreed to make the cake. You never said I had to eat it."

"Light, if no one eats the cake it will go to waste."

"Then have Matsuda eat it! You know I don't like sweet stuff."

"I want _you_ to eat our cake, Light. Please?" He said as he pouted.

Damn that puppy dog face. It was so cute.

"Fine, but there's only one way I'm going to eat it," I said suggestively.

L quickly caught on and grinned as he scooped up the piece of cake.

I moved closer to him, not hearing the door open because of how loud my heart was beating.

* * *

The entire Kira Task Force stood huddled around an unconscious Sochiro lying in a hospital bed.

"Luckily he doesn't have a concussion from when he hit his head," said the doctor. "but it might take him a few hours to wake up. Make sure you let him rest. Fainting is very hard on the body."

Light rubbed the back of his neck and looked up at the ceiling.

'_God, if you're up there, please make him forget what just happened.'_

For the reason Yagami Sochiro had fainted was because when he entered the kitchen to get a glass of water he had seen his son eating cake from his boss's mouth.


	6. Dunkin Donuts

**Title: Dunkin Donuts**

**Prompt: Everything would have been fine, if not for that two-for-one sale on donuts.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own death note or dunkin donuts or harry potter or shugo chara.**

**~A/N: Okay. Today's game is who can be as big of a pervert as me. I was reading a totally disturbing shugo chara! amuto fic and it was really late so craziness occurred and Light and L became super OOC.**

Light looked at himself in the mirror as he finished buttoning his shirt. Damn he looked hot today. (A/N: Don't question it. My insomniac brain made me write that.) He picked up his car keys but after a moment of deliberation he put them back down and grabbed his metro card. After all, why not have some fun and watch all the women fawn over him when he got in the metro car.

His amusing (cougharrogantcoughcough) thoughts were interrupted by his cell phone ringing. He flipped it open and brought it up to his ear in a quick, fluid motion, not bothering to look at the caller ID.

"Hey L's," he said cradling the phone between his ear and shoulder as he put some papers in his briefcase.

"Good morning Light. I have a favor to ask of you."

"Okay, shoot."

"Well, Watari has come down with something so I asked him to take the day off but now I've realized I have no transportation. Could you drive me to work?"

Light sighed. No fun metro-gawking for him today. "Okay, I'll be over. Do you want to get something to eat?"

"Watari told me the super market is having a two-for-one sale on donuts. Would you mind if we bought some?"

"No, that's fine," he replied, rolling his eyes. "I'll pick you up soon."

They said goodbye and again Light picked up his car keys and headed out but not before mumbling, "The things I do for that man," under his breath.

* * *

**Light's POV**

I pulled into L's high-rise apartment's garage and watched him walk over to the car. It was quite something to see him alone with no Watari hovering behind his shoulder. He looked so small.

I started the car as soon as he got in the car – not waiting for him to put on his seatbelt because I knew he wouldn't – and sped out of the parking lot.

"Do you need directions on how to get to the grocery store?" he asked.

"No, I know how to get there. You know, when I asked if we should grab some food I meant going to a café or something. How am I going to run on such few calories?"

"Light I think we both know you have a surprising amount of stamina," he said suggestively.

"Was that really necessary?"

"You are such a teenager."

"Last time I checked I was a legal adult. If I wasn't you'd probably be considered a child molester."

"Light, you were supposed to take a right just then."

* * *

"So," I said standing in front of the shelves lined with boxes of donuts. "Pick two."

L walked up and down the aisle mumbling the occasional "Hmm," or "Nhh." After careful consideration he grabbed two boxes of powdered sugar donuts and gave one to me. I looked at him questioningly, wondering what he was planning to do.

Then he sat down in the middle of the aisle put the box of donuts in his lap, and started eating them one after the other,

"L, what are you doing? You can't just eat them!"

"Are you implying we should so something else with them?"

"No, you pervert! This is a grocery store, not a restaurant! You have to pay for the food before you eat it! Have you never been grocery shopping before?"

"Usually Watari buys all my food," he said innocently from the floor.

"For someone so smart you can be incredibly clueless sometimes. Now come on, we have to go check out."

We headed over to the check out section and got in the express aisle. I handed the clerk the boxes and waited for her to ring them up.

"You know this box is empty, right?"

"Uh... Yeah, about that..."

L popped out from behind me, "I ate them."

The clerk gave L a look but shrugged and bagged the boxes. As soon as we were outside I slapped my hand to my forehead.

"Did I embarrass you?" L asked sarcastically.

"Only just a bit," I reply in the same tone.

We finally arrived at the Headquarters and sat down in two of the black leather chairs. I tossed the other box of donuts to L as I picked up the paper on the coffee table. "You can have those. I'm not that hungry anymore."

I read the paper contently as I listened to the sounds of L chewing until it abruptly stopped. I peered at him over the paper. He was holding a donut in front of his face and staring at me. Then the donut. Then me. I recognized that look.

"Aw, hell no. I am _not_ doing whatever you're thinking about me doing with that donut." I said standing up and backing away.

"Well, technically it would involve the both of us," he got up too and approached me as I kept back away.

"Why do you have to be so goddamn kinky?"

* * *

**~A/N: Wow, I had fun with this one. Now who can guess what L was thinking? XD**

**Ikuto (from Shugo Chara!): I know! Haha, Kiku you are so gross.**

**Me: Yah, says the perverted cosplay cat guy.**

**Draco Malfoy (from Harry Potter): Damn, you are a pervert!**

**Me: Shut uppp! I get enough of that from my friends! Anywhoo, I don't really want you to guess because I would find it disturbing if you people guessed right because that would mean you have a mind like me.**

**Blaise Zambibi (once again from Harry Potter): Review!**

**Me: OMG! BLAISE! *jumps on him***


	7. Good Night

**Title: Good Night**

**Prompt: I slept well despite the monumental changes I knew would be coming my way.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note. If I did random Bleach charas (which I don't own) would make cameos. Oh, and I don't own Princess Tutu. If I did Fakir and Ahiru would have gotten together way earlier.**

**~A/N: OMG! This one is serious! I know it's just shocking coming from me. I hope it didn't turn out so terrible.**

**And a big thank you to all the reviewers and people who alert/favorited my story!**

I was young. I still had so much potential. I didn't want to die before I could show everyone that.

No matter how much I tossed and turned I couldn't shake these thoughts from my head.

Death is a scary thing. No one can tell you what it's like. It's one of the few things you can't understand until you experience it yourself. You don't know if it's painful. You don't know if it's like falling asleep. You don't know if there's anything waiting for you on the other side.

I didn't want to die.

"Light, is something wrong?" I heard a voice beside me ask.

"It's nothing," I murmur back.

I resumed my futile attempts to fall asleep but my brain couldn't stop thinking.

Was I willing to sacrifice myself for the lives of strangers?

"L?" I whispered.

"Yes, Light?"

"Have you ever thought about how... working on this case might get you killed?"

"Yes, I have thought about it before considering the odds are quite high."

"Are you afraid?"

He paused slightly before answering. "Death is inevitable and is something that should be accepted. I would be proud to die for the sake of aiding in the capture of Kira."

"But aren't there still things you want to do with your life?"

"Of course, but I believe that if I die having fulfilled my true purpose in life I will have no regrets."

No regrets. That sounded nice. But what was my purpose in life? Catching Kira? That didn't sound right.

"Hey, L?"

"Yes, Light?"

"Do you want to get married?"

Another slight pause that made my heart pound.

"Okay."

"Thank you," I said pulling him closer and kissing his neck.

Safe in his arms, I quickly fell asleep.

* * *

**Me: I know it's really short but I wanted to write a serious one.**

**Momo (from Bleach): Did someone say short? Are you looking for Toshirou?**

**Toshirou: It's Captain Hitsugaya, and I am not short!**

**Me: Go die Momo! *throws her out of the conversation* Hi Toshy!**

**Toshirou: What did you just call me?**

**Me: Oh right, me and Cristina call you Toshy. I came up with it! :D**

**Cristina: WHERE IS HE!?!?**

**Me: Cricri this is my author's note thingy. That means he hangs out with me.**

**Toshirou: What on earth is going on?!?**

**Cristina: I beg to differ. *pulls out an amuto lemon fic* Fetch! *throws it after Momo***

**Me: KYAA!! *dive bombs after it***

**Cristina: Now Toshirou, why don't we go get Fakir (from Princess Tutu) drunk and have a party at his house.**

**Fakir: Please review.**

**Me: *calls out from out of the conversation* I LOVE YOU FAKIR!**


	8. Stalking

Wow. I really suck. I can't believe I haven't written in like... more than a month. I'm really sorry! I mean it!

Things that have happened to me while I was gone:

(and yes I know you don't really care about my life but it makes me happy pretending you do)

-I developed an intense hatred of sexism. While I was watching this princess tutu amv (Blame my late update on watching amvs. That's what I've been doing this entire time.) I saw this comment on the video about how this dude got a boner from watching it and this other dude commented about how all the chicks in the anime were flat chested so he shouldn't have gotten one and I went into a rage for a whole minute!

-I watched 'A Very Potter Musical" on youtube and became obsessed with it. You guys should watch it. It makes fun of Harry Potter (which I love) and it's amazingly funny. DRACOXHERMIONE FOREVER!

-I started writing a Shugo Chara fic. Bad me, I know, but if you watch that anime and like amuto, you should read it when I post.

Oh and by the way, ever since I (shocker) watched this LxLight amv I've been wondering, why is yaoi so hot? I mean, I know it's super amazing, but why?

TADA! NEW ONE-SHOT! I know it's super short but I'm working on a really big one with lots of characters so just give me a little time.

Disclaimer: I don't own death note, princess tutu, a very potter musical, harry potter, or shugo chara.

"Is this really necessary, Ryuzaki?"

"Yes Yagami-san, it is."

"Well... Do you think maybe just I could monitor the cameras instead of the both of us?"

"No, I'm afraid that's not an option. I would consent if it was Sayu-chan or your wife, but your son is the one under suspicion."

"But... do you really think he's going to do something suspicious _now_ of all times?"

"We still don't know how Kira actually kills people, so there is a slight possibility."

"... I'm sorry Ryuzaki. I can't do this. I have to respect my son's privacy. You can continue if you really think it's the right thing to do."

The sound of the door closing as Yagami-san left the room was music to L's ears.

"He finally left," the raven haired man murmured as he stroked the image of Yagami-kun taking a shower on the tv screen.

Yeah, it's a bit weird but the idea came to me while I was (haha) in the shower. Read and review?


	9. City Hall

A/N: Readers. Dear, dear readers. This will be your next to last one-shot. This is a random thing I came up with when I was listening to Here (In Your Arms) by HelloGoodBye WHICH IS THE BEST SONG EVER!!!!! Okay done. Your last one-shot is going to be a big happy filled awesome-tude summin or other with lot's of characters. If you can't tell I'm blasting Here (In Your Arms), dancing around my room, and chugging lemonade. HERE YA GOOOOOO!!!!

"Light- Light, you're strangling me."

"You will wear a tie and you will LIKE IT!"

"I honestly don't know why you're making such a big fuss over this. We're just going to City Hall. It's not like there's going to be a priest or anything."

"L you may believe that this is _our_ day, but in fact it's MY day and it will be perfect despite the fact that neither of us believe in religious ceremonies."

"I will concede that this is an important event, but do I really have to wear this outfit?"

"Yes, yes you do. For once in your life you will look presentable and wear shoes. And if I don't say so myself I think that charcoal gray suit you chose really brings out your eyes."

"Light, you bought this suit and forced me to wear it."

"Did I? Hmm, I don't quite remember that."

"Is- Is that a limo I see outside?"

"Of course. What else would we be arriving in?"

"A car? A regular, normal car?"

"Don't be ridiculous. This _is_ a wedding."

I FEEL SO SAD! I DON'T WANT TO END THIS FIC! I HAVEN'T EVEN FINISHED WRITING THE LAST CHAPTER AND I'M ALREADY THIS UPSET!

Oh and my next project after I finish this story up and then finish my other story (Land of Opportunity – Shugo Chara) is going to be a Bleach Story. You should read it once I get around to writing it. XD It's gonna be about the epsada and Ulquiorra and this OC. It's not going to be a romance or anything, just for fun. The endings gonna be mega depressing though. ;D


	10. Love In This Club Pt1

**A/N: Okay. I've decided by the time I finish this you'll all be bored with me so I'm posting it as a two-shot. Yeah, I know this is a one-shot series but deal with it. I love you for the reviews and everything and I'm hoping I'll get even more for these last two chapters. So, here you go. Yeah, I know I'm being boring. Deal. Oh wait! STORY TIME! My geometry teacher is really annoying because he gave me a D on my quiz—Oh wait I can't tell you the story because then my sister will see. =[ Oh boo. Okay done!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note and I actually don't own the name of this two-shot either. Usher does. Heehee. Oh and I don't own Solid Snake. If you people don't know who he is you need help.**

**LOVE IN THIS CLUB**

**PART ONE**

_You are cordially invited to a night of clubbing with Light Yagami and "L" Lawliet. We would be glad to have your company this Friday at 11:00._

"Why the heck did you send out invitations? Do you even know how these kinds of things work, L?"

"I just assumed I should treat it like a regular party. Was it wrong to do so, Light?"

"You have no idea."

!!!

"What the hell is L thinking?" a certain leather pants wearing blonde exclaimed as he read his invitation.

"Huh? Did something happen, Mello?" the copper haired boy beside him asked, not looking up from his gameboy.

"Take a look at this," he replied, flicking the card over to his friend.

"Maybe the dude's not as smart as we all thought he was."

"Hey Matt, do you think he invited the sheep?" Mello asked, taking out a bar of chocolate and ripping it open.

"Well if he invited _you,_ I'm sure he's invited Near," Matt replied.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Oh, uh, nothing," he answered quickly, seeing the murderous look Mello was giving him. "So are you going to go?"

"Yeah, and you're coming with me."

!!!

"Well this is rather curious," a small, pale boy with white hair murmured as he sat next to a pile of legos, reading a card.

"What is it, Near?" An elderly man asked as he came closer to inspect.

"It seems I've been invited to a social event, Roger."

"Really?" he replied, shocked.

"I know, it's quite astounding."

"What is the event, pray tell?"

"It looks like I," Near pronounced, standing up, "am going clubbing."

"W-What?" Roger sputtered. He could not imagine the boy doing such a thing. "Near, I do not think you should attend."

"Roger, I have to. This is my chance to prove to everyone that I can be 'fun' and 'cool'," he replied, making air quotes.

Roger sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "If it's really that important to you, fine, you can go, but I will come with you as a chaperone."

"Alright," Near called back as he was already dancing away to his closet to decide what to wear.

!!!

"EH? Light is inviting Misa to go clubbing with him?" the blonde model exclaimed. But why is he bringing that attention-whore L? Always trying to steal Light away from Misa..." she grumbled.

Misa sat down on her bed, taking one of her countless mirrors into her hands, and proceeded to stare at her flawless complexion. She found that doing this always cheered her up.

"Misa is so cute she bets she could cure depression," Misa said to herself. "If only Light would look at Misa and notice how absolutely _adorable_ she is."

The blonde's thoughts were temporarily disrupted by a brief bout of insanity where she thought she saw a zit forming her nose. Then she remembered she was too gorgeous to have acne.

"Wait, that's it!" she exclaimed, falling of her bed in the process. "Misa will show up to the club looking so cute that Light will have to pay attention to her!"

So the blonde too began preparing her wardrobe for the big night.

!!!

(btw this next part is pure crack)

A scream that one would assume was only possible for a fangirl to produce was heard from Mikami's apartment. No Mikami was no fangirl, he was a fan_boy_.

"OMG! _The_ Light Yagami sent me a letter! What if it's a love letter? KYA!" the man exclaimed with stars in his eyes.

Suddenly a little devil Mikami appeared on his left shoulder. "Come on man, just rip it open. Don't you want to find out what's inside?"

Then an angel Mikami appeared on his right. "No! Stop right there!" it cried just as Mikami was about to open it. "We have to do it carefully so we can put it in the MikamixLight4ever scrapbook!"

"Omg, you're so right!" Mikami gasped. Then he flicked the devil off his shoulder. "You're a bad influence. You almost ruined my scrapportunity."

"Here," the angel said, fluttering away. "I'll get a letter opener."

Once the angel had returned with the letter opener, Mikami carefully extracted the card.

"OMAFLUFFINGAWD!" he screamed after reading the invitation. "Light is totally asking me on a date! My ouija board was right!"

The reason for Mikami's misunderstanding was that after he had reaching Light's name on the invitation, he began jumping up and down, not reading the rest, including the part that said L was coming too.

"Angel! Fetch me some tape! It's scrap bookin' time!"

(yes that's what Mikami's like in my mind)

Next Friday Night:

"Light, stop pacing. You're making people stare," L said to his agitated boyfriend.

"No, you're what's making people stare," Light retorted, referring to L's outfit. Instead of his usual white long-sleeve T shirt and blue jeans he was wearing a pair of tight leather pants with buckles up the sides and a black T shirt with a skull bleeding pale blue blood and mesh sleeves that looped around his thumbs.

"And is that a good thing or a good thing or a bad thing?" L said with a hint of a smile as he looked around at all the girls eyeing him.

"Bad. Good. Both!"

L had never seen Light this stressed before. He was beginning to grow concerned.

"Light, what on earth is wrong with you? You seem intensely nervous."

"I just know this entire night is going to be one big fiasco."

"What gives you that idea?"

"Come on L, half of them are from Wammy's."

"I find that offensive," L said, his eyes narrowing slightly. "There is nothing wrong with Wammy's House for-"

Suddenly they heard a familiar voice cry out, "EY! Come on dawg, let me in!"

"Sorry junior, no underage kids allowed," another voice said.

"Yo, you crazy, man? I aint no little kid. I'm 24, check my ID!"

Light leaned against the door frame chuckling at the sight before him. Little Near was desperately trying to convince the bouncer that he was old enough to get in. But more interestingly, instead of his usual garb of white pajamas Near was decked out in full ghetto gear including massive gold chains and other assorted bling.

"Would you like to rethink that statement?" Light asked L smugly.

An old man stepped forward from behind Near. He said something quietly to the door man and slipped some green into his hand.

"My mistake, head on in," the doorman said as he flashed a smile.

"Near, what are you wearing?" Light asked, trying not to laugh.

"Yo, what you wearin' sucka? We're goin' clubbin', not ta church!" Near replied, looking at Light's boring outfit of a polo and khakis. "See, L knows was' up!"

"Hello Near, Roger. It's been a long time," L said to the pair.

"It certainly has, L," the old man replied.

"Yeah boy! You should come back to Wammy's so we can party," Near added, pronouncing party more like "paw-day" which confused L for a moment.

Then the DJ put on a fast latin beat and Near exclaimed, "Aww sucka, this is my jam!" and ran off to the dance floor.

"Near, please wait!" Roger called after him, following him into the crowd of people.

"Honestly, if I'm expected to last the night, I'm going to need some alcohol," Light said, walking over to the bar.

"I honestly don't know what you're worried about," L said as he followed him. "I admit that Near might be behaving a little strangely but Mello is relatively normal."

"Ha!" Light laughed. "That trigger-happy kid? I'd be surprised if he didn't murder at least one person tonight."

"Now Light, I think you're being a little unfair. You only met him-"

L was again cut off by another familiar voice, this time near the bar.

"What do you mean you don't have the chocolate cake shot?" the voice screeched.

"Dude, I'm sorry but no one likes chocolate vodka!" the bartender said backing away with his hands up, palms facing the fiery blonde in defense.

"_I_ like chocolate vodka! Are you calling me a NOBODY?" Mello exclaimed, grabbing the collar of the bartender's shirt and lifting him up.

"Mello, calm down. Just get the mocha shot," Matt said lazily from the barstool beside him.

"He needs to be medicated," Light muttered darkly, as he surveyed the distance between himself and the subject in order to calculate if he would have enough time to escape in the event that something unfortunate occured.

"While I find that a bit extreme, maybe we should wait until a more... opportune moment to greet Mello."

As soon as L had said Mello's name, the blonde's head shot up, eyes darting around. When they found L his face broke into a childish grin.

"OY! L, over here!" he called, waving the hand that wasn't clutching the bartender's shirt.

L walked forward somewhat reluctantly and greeted him, making sure to keep track of where his hands were at all times. "It's a pleasure to have you Mello."

"Wouldn't miss it. Who would give up the chance to see pretty boy try and loosen up?" Mello quipped, addressing Light who had followed L.

Light rolled his eyes as a response and sat down at the bar. "I'll have a jagger" he said to the bartender who was still being suspended two feet off the ground.

The bartender tapped Mello's fist, reminding him that he was still there. Mello gave him one last sneer before roughly dropping him back onto the floor.

"TWAT!" He yelled as the man scuttled away to make Light's drink. Matt snorted, his eyes glued to his PSP.

"Mello, I think you forgot to introduce us to your guest," Light said, vaguely gesturing at the skinny gamer next to him.

"I didn't forget, dumbass. L already knows him and I doubt he wants to talk to you," Mello growled. Then, turning to L he asked, "You do remember him, right?"

L peered at Matt for a couple seconds before replying. "Yes, you were at Wammy's too, weren't you? Martin was it?"

"It's Matt. Yeah, I was third in line the succeed you. Ring any bells?" He asked sarcastically, one eyebrow quirked up.

"Oh. It's _you_..." L murmured ominously, his eyes glazing over as he remembered a particularly awkward incident when he had needed to give Matt a psycho analysis on why he kept having sexual fantasies about Solid Snake. He quickly shook the thought from his head. "Well then, we still have two more guests to greet, so we'll be off." He then grabbed Light's wrist and pulled him away from the bar.

Mello watched the two walk away, particularly noting how L's pants were fan-fuckin-tastic in every which way and how he'd have to ask where he bought them. Suddenly, a hand was waving in front of his face, obstructing his view of L's leather swathed posterior. "Mells? You okay?"

"Those are some pretty kick-ass pants."

"You are such a freak," Matt said after recovering from a fit of laughter. "Come on, I'm bored. Let's go play DDR."

"They have DDR here?"

"Of course they do, it's Japan."

Now the author will return to the main characters after her brief MattxMello fan service.

"So, who are the two people you invited that haven't shown up yet?" Light inquired. He hoped to dear Kira that L hadn't invited that girl Linda. When Light had met her she and her friends were composing the "We Love Near Forever Times Ten" theme song for their club.

"Oh, just some people..."

Before Light could even begin to question L's curious behavior he heard something, or to be precise, two somethings that made his skin crawl and his legs quiver with fear.

"Light!" two people exclaimed from behind him exclaimed. He slowly turned around, hoping his hearing was somehow malfunctioning and that these two people were in fact _not_ the people that he had never in a million years expected L to invite.

**A/N: I actually really like it. I do. And yes I know Mikami was extra fricken absolutely OOC but hey, I like him better this way. Pt. 2 will be up... eventually. Until then, byez and REVIEW!**


	11. Love In This Club Pt2

A/N: So this is it. I'm done. I have to admit writing this was exhausting. Actually, I wrote the last part of this on my phone and had to type it up at 11 at night. Thanks for reading. Thanks for inflating my ego. Thank you reviewers. Thank you story alert/favorite-ers. Oh yeah, and If you read this and you like if could you please review? I mean just a simple "thumbs up" will do. I would love you for that. I hope you like this last installment of my death note one-shots.

Disclaimer: I don't own the title Love in this club, the name posh spice, the name Mr. Spock, I don't know if I have to put this in here but Lindsay Lohan, or legos, the name DS, the name Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hour Glass, the name Vanilla Ice, Danny Phantom or the Danny Phantom theme song, the name Milky Way, Optimus Prime, or the phrase "tricks are for kids".

**LOVE IN THIS CLUB**

**PART ONE**

Both Misa and Mikami were speed walking toward him, trying to elbow each other out of the way so they could get to him first. Light shot L a quick _'Thank you very much, I mean that from the depths of my soul.'_ glare before hesitantly saying, "Hello Misa... and Mikami..."

"Light can you _please_ tell me why the Baby Spice wannabe and the Panda are here?" Mikami demanded, stomping his foot daintily.

L stepped forward to answer the question for Light, his eyes narrowed dangerously at the use of the word panda. "I am here because I organized this event. Misa is here because I invited her."

Misa's whimper of, "L invited Misa, not Light?" was drowned out by Mikami's wail of, "So this isn't a date?"

Light raked a hand through his hair. He was going to have to have a talk with L after this. "Mikami, you know I don't feel that way about you."

"Yeah Mikami, he likes Misa better!" Misa exclaimed, remembering her plan and pressing her body up against Light's chest in a possessive hug.

Light looked down, just realizing what Misa was wearing. He found it astounding that such little fabric could pass as clothing these days. Her shirt looked as if someone had wrapped a strip of fabric around her chest, leaving room in the middle so everyone could see the full range of her cleavage, then crisscrossed some cord through the center. Her skirt-if it even qualified as a skirt-had even less fabric, giving any passerby a wonderful view of her reproductive area when she bent over.

"Um, Misa, could you please let go?" Light asked while trying to pry her off without touching as much skin as possible.

"OMG! Slut alert! Slut alert!" Mikami screeched while tugging on Misa's hair in an effort to help Light dislodge her.

L quickly stepped in front of him and pinched Misa below the beck. She slumped from Light's arms to the floor.

Light felt an arm wrap around his waist and guide him away toward a mass of dancing people.

"Thanks for getting rid of Misa, L"

"Don't thank me, thank Mr. Spock."

"Nooo!" Mikami howled, reaching his hand out toward the quickly disappearing man of his dreams.

"You-stupid-hooker-it's-all-your-fault!" he screamed at the unconscious Misa, punctuating each word with a slap.

Suddenly she jerked awake. "No! Not the face! Anywhere but Misa's face!"

"Why?" Mikami scoffed. "It's not like there's anything there good enough to worry about damaging."

"GASP! You know what? Misa doesn't have to put up with this abuse," she huffed, picking herself up. "Misa is going to go dance with Light and make him want to have sex with her."

"Nice try Miss Bimbo but L already ran off with him," Mikami quipped, tapping his foot in impatience.

"Seriously?" Misa glanced around, just noticing his absence. "Well, Misa will go find him and steal him back then!" she proclaimed as she marched off to the dance floor.

"Why does everyone leave me?" Mikami moaned before proceeding to go to the bar where he would be drinking apple-tinis until mentioned again.

The music was booming and it seemed like all the bodies on the floor were moving together almost like water. Group of girls, groups of guys, groups of both sexes together all getting nice and cozy with each other.

This was not his scene.

Light looked around anxiously as L brought him to the center of the club. Despite all the airs he had put on about having known how clubs work and being fully experienced, he had no skill here. He was good at consuming alcohol. That was kind of it in these types of places.

Light noticed L intently staring at him. He shot him a questioning look. What was he supposed to do? Just start break dancing and grinding? Seriously, what were they even doing there? This type of thing clearly wasn't meant for them.

"Dance with me," was all L said.

At first L was just shuffling his feet, but as he got accustomed to the beat he began moving his body along with the rhythm. He swung his hips. His arms swayed in the air. It all seemed very natural to him, like this was the way he was meant to move. Some how he managed to look masculine yet graceful, serene yet provocative.

He gave his head a quick flick to get the hair that was stuck to his forehead out of his eyes and looked at Light. There was something different about his eyes, something inviting.

Light watched L's movements for a second more before mirroring his steps. As he grew more comfortable he began to adapt them to his personal style. While he wasn't as relaxed as L, there was something about him that made you look twice, whether it was his eyes, bright and alive, or the way his body curved toward the man next to him, making him seem that bit more sensual than the others.

The two gradually began moving closer and closer until Light's arms found themselves around L's neck, fingering his sweat matted hair, and L's hand found themselves on Light's hips.

The pair was one with the sea of moving people

Meanwhile, Misa clawed her way through the crowd of people.

"Light! Light!" She called after her beloved.

"Hey girl, wanna dance?" A middle aged man who reeked of alcohol asked her, coming close.

"Uh, sorry, Misa's kind of looking for someone, plus she only goes for metrosexual guys," Misa replied, stepping back.

"Wait, did you just say Misa?" A red-headed girl who had been dancing near her asked.

"Yup! My name's Misa-Misa, actress, model, and all around super cute blondie!" Misa exclaimed with a dramatic wink.

"Oh don't worry, I know who you are," The girl gushed. "You should go ask the club's manager if you can DJ!"

"But Misa is just an actress," Misa faltered. "She doesn't know how to DJ..."

"Oh it's easy. I'm an actress too, and they let me do it all the time!" the girl countered. "People love it too. They get so happy they throw stuff at me like shoes and martini glasses."

"Well, in that case Misa will go ask! By the way, what's your name?"

"Lindsay Lohan."

So after thanking her new friend Lindsay, Misa headed to the manager's office while she developed a new plan to win Light's attention.

Now, let's hop over to Near land. Basically for all this time the writer had been ignoring him and writing about the characters she likes better, the little fiend had been attempting to release all the sexual frustration that comes with being a teenager who looks like he belongs in daycare.

However through much effort, the boy found some women who looked _astoundingly_ like the author and had fetishes for young looking men and was now dancing with them while Roger desperately tried to pretend he wasn't there.

Near had to admit, this was definitely better than playing with his legos.

The beat was fast and pulsing in his ears. There was only the here and now. Try as he might he just couldn't seem to care what was going to happen tomorrow when he would most likely have a splitting headache and temporary hearing loss. The lack of pressure was almost making him light headed.

He didn't have to think about what L would say about his current actions. He didn't have to compete with Mello. He didn't have to worry about what the other orphans thought of him, not that it really mattered to him anyway.

Right now he wasn't Near. He was Nate.

He hadn't been Nate in a long time.

The world was no longer a distraction he had to isolate himself from. Now he could fully embrace it and the emotions that came with it. Happiness. Passion. Excitement.

Suddenly the music cut off, breaking him out of his delirious state of joy. Several groans of annoyance rose from the crowd.

"Guess who's here?" a voice san from the shadows of the stage.

Immediately a scream was produced from every female from the club. Now granted that some were screams of disbelief and irritation, but you have to respect the fact that everyone knew who it was.

"It's Misa!" she exclaimed as a blue spotlight shown down on her. "Misa's decided that she's taking over the club. She's going to DJ!"

Near noticed that the women around him were in the "squeals of delight" faction of the crowd and decided to test a hypothesis that Mello had come up with; being connected gets you into people's pants.

"Ey, yo. Check dis, I know that chick."

"You know Misa-Misa?" the blonde one chirped.

"That's fabulous!" the one with really long legs gushed.

"You know what would be great? If you got her to let you go up on stage with her," the one with the killer rack said, batting her eyes.

"Foshiz? You think so?"

"Uh-uh," she breathed. "And if you could get her to talk to me after this place closes up, I just might have to take you back to my apartment to thank you."

Was-was that a wink?

SCORE!

"Awrite shortie, I'll see if I can make it happen," Near said nonchalantly before pimp walking away.

Once he reached Roger, who had been some ways away due to the scarring that had occurred in his brain, Near began jumping up and down like an overexcited puppy.

"Roger, we've got to talk to Misa _now_."

Now over at another spot in the crowd, two people were having a very different reaction to the turn of events.

"What deranged person would let _her_ near a microphone?"

"Maybe she some how bought the whole club."

"How the hell would she have gotten that much money?"

"We don't know what her previous 'acting' experience is, Light."

Light turned to look L in the eyes, a fire burning in his eyes.

"L, we have to do something before she embarrasses me."

Imagine a club owner being confronted by two men and a child.

First of all, he had to be thinking he would need to have a talk with his bouncers on why this tiny kid was allowed to enter his club.

Second, he would probably want to know why the taller man seemed to be having a brain aneurism and why no one was taking him to a hospital.

And third, he would be wondering how the strange looking man standing in front of them seemed to know that they were serving alcohol to minors.

"Sir, if you don't let us go see Misa-Misa we will be forced to tell the police about this information."

It was no surprise they were onstage within minutes.

"Misa, let go of the microphone right now!" Light boomed as the trio walked into sight.

"Yeah sucka, and give it ta' me!" Near shouted, walking over to her.

"Light!" she squealed as she simultaneously threw the mic to Near and launched herself at Light. "I knew this would get your attention!"

She snuggled herself into his chest before L loomed into view behind Light's shoulder, his face threatening another nerve pinch. Then she quickly stepped back and settled for holding his hands. "Isn't this great? Now Misa can play lots of country instead of that awful techno stuff!"

"You will do no such thing!" Light replied, his eyes bulging. "Do you know what will happen to me if people find out I brought you here?"

"They'll thank you for bringing the wonderful sparkly unicorn that is Misa?" she replied, innocently cocking her head.

"They'll burn me at the stake!"

"And we wouldn't want that, now would we?" interjected L who was feeling very left out by their conversation and decided to put a stop to it. "And, if say, the populace was to find out Light brought Near with him too and Near did something irritating and/or obnoxious that would be bad too, correct?"

Light's headed whipped over in Near's direction.

Oh.

Oh God.

Near was rapping.

"MOTHER FUCKING HELL NO!"

Mello was angry.

"What is that little shit doing? Who does he think he is?"

Mello was furious.

"Why the hell is he even here?"

Mello was in a full on rage.

"I told you he was probably going to be here," Matt said from behind him as he walked through the door of the club.

"I leave for two seconds, _two_ seconds and look what happens. The little shit MANAGES TO GET ON STAGE!" he fumed.

"We were gone for longer than two seconds, Mells. It's not like I have the record for 'fastest cigarette ever smoked'," the gamer replied as he pulled out his DS and started playing Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hour Glass.

"And what is he wearing? Is he trying to win a Vanilla Ice look-alike contest?"

"You know, if you keep pacing like that you're going to bore a hole straight through to the center of the earth."

Mello grabbed Matt's chin, forcing him to look him in the eyes. He gave a small noise of irritation as heard the 'game over' sound come from his hand held. "Matt, we have to do something about this. We can't let this little fucker get away with trying to be a rapper. He's not even rapping well! Listen!"

Up on stage Near was saying:

" Yo, Danny Phantom he was just 14,

When his parents built a very strange machine,

It was designed to view a world unseen,

When it didn't quite work his folks they just quit,

Then Danny took a look inside of it,

There was a great big flash,

Everything just changed,

His molecules got all rearranged..."

"What is he even talking about?" Mello shouted, throwing his arms into the air. "Genetic mutation? Vampires?"

"Well actually, he's talking about a half ghost, half boy from a cartoon, but Mello we have to stop him. He can't get away with besmirching the name of Danny Phantom," Matt replied, dragging Mello in the direction of the management offices.

This was the worst possible situation Light could imagine.

Practically moments after Near had begun chanting his little song Mello had charged on stage demanding to have a rap battle with Near, and of course to live up to his new 'gangsta' reputation the small boy had acquiesced. And not only that, but Misa was _still_ clinging onto his arm.

Now the whole club was clapping a beat while Mello bobbed his head, preparing to start rhyming.

Suddenly he started speaking, words flowing effortlessly.

"Hey my name is Mello and I'm the real number one,

I'm chillin' with my boy Matt, we gonna have some fun,

Gonna go out and guy some chocolate but not no Milky Way,

That shit tastes like crap plus it's really gay,

After that I'll call up my mafia,

We're gonna beat up Near 'till he shit , yea,

We'll beat up his lily ass,

'Cause he ain't gansta', he's got no swagger and no class."

Then he passed the mic to Near with a smirk, challenging him to do better, to prove himself. He didn't really care that most of the crowd was booing him. All he cared about was what Near was going to do next. This was just another contest to him, another opportunity to beat his rival.

And Near knew this. He also knew he was going to win.

Near set up a beat for the crowd to clap, before starting in on his rap. His words came slower and he stumbled over some parts, but his words were confident and there was a glow about him that betrayed just how much fun he was really having.

"Hello, Hello, it's your boy Near,

This loser is done rhymin' so have no fear,

Now he says I've got no swagger,

But don't listen to his chatter,

I'm a bad-ass guy,

He can't beat me up and here's why,

He's got the girliest hair around,

In his balls not an ounce of testosterone can be found."

The club exploded.

Whoops of appreciation and thunderous claps crashed over everyone's ears. Even a small mosh pit had formed at the base of the stage. Everyone was cheering for the tiny rapper.

An uncharacteristic grin broke out over Near's face before he covered it up with a cocky smirk. He had beat Mello again, just like he knew he would, and better yet he had discovered he could in fact be socially acceptable.

And better yet he was _so_ going to get laid tonight.

"Thank God that's finally over," Light sighed as he watched Mello storm off the stage after giving Near the finger. "Can we go home now?"

"And can Misa come home with Light?" Misa asked from Light's side as she stroked his hip with her pointer finger.

Suddenly a thump was heard as a body was thrown onto the stage.

"Is that a dead body?" Misa screamed, clutching Light's arm as the body twitched. L quickly pinched her wrist and removed it from Light, stepping in between the two.

"Silly girl, tricks are for kids," Mikami said as he picked himself up, brushing the dirt off his clothes. "It's just me."

"Mikami, what are _you_ doing here?" the blonde sneered, crinkling her button nose.

"I'm here to compete with you. You know, you're not the only one in love with Light," he remarked as he plucked the microphone out of Near's hand. "I'll be taking that."

"Hey sucka, what do you think you're doin'?" Near whined as Mikami held the microphone above his head.

"Oh, go play with your little Optimus Prime doll. Don't you have better things to do?" Mikami scoffed as the small boy jumped up and down, trying to reach the object in his hand.

"Now that you mention it," Near replied, slipping out of his gansta persona, "I actually have to talk to Misa." So the boy ran over to Misa and pulled her off to the wing of the stage babbling about how she was about to meet the prettiest woman in the world and how she better be nice to her.

"Everyone pay attention to me!" Mikami sang as he tapped the mic. A loud, harsh sound filled the room and all eyes turned to Mikami as the people covered their still ringing ears.

"Hi everybody, my name's Mikami and I have something _really _important to say, okay?" he told the crowd. A few noises of annoyance were heard from the people as they realized both Misa and the rappers were gone and not coming back.

"Okay, so you see that guy over there?" Mikami asked, pointing over to Light.

L did not like where this conversation was going. Based on the man's previous actions he had a pretty clear idea what he was going to say.

"His name is Light Yagami. I'm going to marry him."

The club was silent for a moment before Mikami went flying across the stage and some how L was standing in his place with the microphone.

"I would like to tell you all that for the record, what Mikami just stated is in fact not possible as I am already married to Light Yagami. Thank you."

L then tossed the microphone behind him, sauntered over to Light, slung an arm around his waist and exited the club.

**REVOO!**


End file.
